Is Feeling Suffocated in Marriage Normal?

Understanding Normalcy in Marriage

Every marriage has its ups and downs, and feeling suffocated can be one of those downs. It’s a feeling many encounter, stemming from routine, unspoken needs, or differing expectations. Many partners enter marriage hoping to fulfill key psychological needs through their relationship. A recent study suggests that moving or significant life changes can heighten reliance on a spouse for emotional support, leading to feelings of being smothered or trapped.

The concept of marriage has evolved to meet not just basic companionship needs but self-actualization ones, which can sometimes be hard to fulfill. According to the suffocation model of marriage , expectations have increased, placing more strain on relationships. This evolution suggests that suffocating feelings might arise when these higher needs are unmet, causing dissatisfaction.

Understanding the difference between typical feelings of closeness and suffocation can be key to maintaining satisfaction in marriage. In some cases, partners may feel overwhelmed not because of their partner’s faults, but due to personal expectations of what marriage should fulfill.

Common Causes for Feeling Suffocated

Factors such as lack of personal space, communication breakdown, or high expectations can contribute to this feeling. Recognizing these causes can help in addressing the problem. Often, feeling suffocated arises from an imbalance in the relationship where one’s personal needs overshadow shared experiences or mutual respect.

Frequently, these feelings develop when one partner feels overdependent due to unresolved personal issues or past traumas. When someone loses sight of their own individuality and relies heavily on their spouse for validation or identity, it may lead to exhaustion and a loss of joy in the relationship.

In some cases, external pressures like family interference, work stress, or financial issues compound the sense of suffocation. They can appear as impositions on personal time and emotional reserves, catalyzing feelings of being trapped or restricted.

An article discussing signs of feeling suffocated in a relationship helps identify behaviors, such as an imbalance in shared responsibilities or a constant need for reassurance, which contribute to a stifling dynamic.

Addressing the Emotion

Identifying the root cause of suffocation, whether personal or relational, is crucial. Talking it out with your partner and setting boundaries can help in alleviating these feelings. Communication serves as the foundation for resolving issues of dependency or unmet expectations within marriage.

Engaging in dialogue about personal goals and aspirations outside of the marriage may fortify individual identities and reduce reliance on the partner for emotional needs. Discussing these openly paves the way to mutual understanding and shared space without infringing on each other’s autonomy.

Couples may benefit from creating a ‘safe space’ for honest communication, as suggested in dealing with relationship burnout. Enabling frank conversations about suffocation feelings without judgment can heal and empower both parties.

When to Seek Help

If these feelings persist, seeking professional help like marriage counseling can provide strategies to resolve underlying issues. It’s important to recognize when the situation may need external intervention. Counselors can guide couples in developing empathy, listening skills, and conflict resolution techniques.

Reference signs of a toxic marriage to discern whether suffocation is escalating to a more harmful dynamic deserving immediate intervention. Professional guidance can then be leveraged to assess the health of the relationship.

Remember, seeking therapy or counseling is a proactive approach, not a signal of failure. It’s an investment in the health of the relationship and legitimizes the shared desire for growth and sustainability within the marriage.

Embracing the support of third-party professionals, like those accessible via DivorcePlus , can open up new perspectives and methods to rebuild and refresh emotional connections.

Conclusion: Navigating Suffocating Feelings in Marriage

Feeling suffocated in a marriage can indeed be normal due to various personal and relational factors. However, open communication, personal space, and seeking external support can help in addressing these feelings. It’s important to remember that each marriage is unique, and what feels right for one couple may differ for another.